Can trust be rebuilt? Trust has been lost over the last year in a host of ways. It is not hard to see systems break down in our society, career paths squashed, and relationships took a huge hit in our world. Families, friends and just about every one of our relationships were challenged in trust…including our relationship with God.
What happens when things are broken in a relationship? How do we rebuild?
Recently, I heard a Ted Talks on this topic and it talked about rebuilding trust taking three things: authenticity, logic and empathy. These three pieces need to be present when working on a broken relationship.
Authenticity: We really need to be authentic in our relationships or then it is not a real relationship. (Psalm 119:73-74)
Empathy: Empathy is required to have a mutual relationship. It is defined as the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. (Galatians 6:2-3)
Logic: This part of the triangle fascinated me! Logic is the form of communication necessary to have understanding. (I know this is where people throw their hands up and determine that rebuilding trust requires the other person to be logical…but both parties need understanding). She drew a simple triangle to explain logic. (Proverbs 3:5)
Start with the story? Many of us start with story and maybe, maybe get to the point sometime in the future. When there is no trust or empathy, then the story will probably fog up the logic and create confusion in understanding if we ever get to the point.
Start with the point? Most of us should start with the point so it is not lost in the story. When rebuilding trust, we may have an opportunity to share the story when trust is built by the point.
This is an incredible formula that can be used in every relationship. Think about how you implement this in your life. When I am with people I trust, I tell them the whole story because the all details matter. When I am with someone I don’t trust, I usually get to the point pretty quick (and maybe I should more quickly). I usually try to tell people the story so they have empathy, but I’m learning it doesn’t work that way. Many times when I am telling a story and I see someone mentally check out…I should get to the point and wrap it up.
Hopefully you can take this formula into your life and put it to good use. While human relationships are hard, God does not need a formula. He loves you just the way you are, he is with you in your emotion, and he understands your story. Trust Him while rebuilding trust in other relationships.
Grow Anyway 
Great devotional Amy, thanks! I need to start with the point more often!! 🙏🙌❤
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That is good medicine! This broken world has taken such a toll on everyone and only Jesus can truly bring wholeness back into our hearts and relationships.💟
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Thank you Joan and Kim!
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Hi, Amy!
This is a great devotional and application of Godly principles. I have been applying getting to the point more often and it really does help, whether I trust the relationship or not.
I heard a great analogy at a conference that really spoke to me that is along these lines. The speaker talked about looking at yourself, or personality, as a deck of cards. Some give out their cards one at a time to another, while some play “war” with them and flutter all cards at once at the other person, overwhelming them. Details, unnecessary or pertinent, do need to be delivered like salt, with care and precision. Presenting the point with a little bit of detail seasoning gives the listener a better, and less convoluted, exchange.
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Thank you Nancy! Such a great analogy about the cards.
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